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Judy Behl posted a condolence
Tuesday, May 29, 2018
Before we go any further, let me preface this eulogy with a statement of fact. Nothing that is said here today can begin to capture the true essence and being of my mother, Florence Jean Pannell, but in a fool’s errand, we’ll try.
I choose the word being because I believe she continues “to be” in those she touched in life. And there are so many who were touched by her presence and who were brought healing and comfort by her soft, strong hands. I clearly remember her getting ready for an 11 to 7 shift at the hospital. She truly was the vision of Florence Nightingale. So perfectly groomed, white from head to toe, and armed with the mighty tri-color pen! There were nights I wished I had some dread disease that, of course, didn’t have disgusting side effects or would cause me any pain or discomfort, so I could go with her and play with all those kids she fretted about when she got home in the morning and then sent us off St Raphael’s. How I envied those sick kids back then. They got the nurse that looked like a movie star and I got the mom that made me clean my room. Mom was also the neighborhood Minute Clinic of the day. She tended everybody on 8th Street and beyond, giving shots, binding wounds, and taking temps…a MASH Unit, you could say. Doing private duty nursing for friends, family, and neighbors in the hospital pro bono was the norm for her. She gently guided many souls on their way in her long years with Hospice. She gave solace to both patient and loved ones because of her unassuming and kind demeanor. In the end, I think she probably just relaxed and took her own advice to be at peace and just let go.
Mom’s early life makes me ashamed to admit how we kids always “just had to have” when as a child she had so little. The eldest of 10 children of the Depression Era, she was destined to be a caregiver and provider “par excellance” and she never shied away from this challenge. I remember her telling me of how she was paid in pennies counted miserly into her outstretched hand to help make ends almost meet while going to Nursing School. Undeterred, she did finish school, married a handsome young sailor and went on to fill first a Brooklyn apartment and then an East Meadow home with 8 individual packs of dynamite! We flourished under her sometimes “I’m just resting my eyes”. Granted, we slept between Meadowbrook sheets, wore hand me down hand me downs, ate day old bread and bruised fruit from the A&P, with our lives seemingly held together by adhesive tape and safety pins…but that was just how you got by. For all that, I don’t think we ever felt poor and we weren’t, not really. “Willful waste makes willful want” still rings in my head all these years later. To this day I marvel at how she and dad provided for us in our youth and way, way beyond.
But I feel Mom truly came into her own when she claimed the title of “Grandma”! She had found the sweetest reward in life. Here she could shoo away the phantoms of the Depression that haunted her childhood and share the wonders of the world thru the eyes, ears, and messy hands of her beloved grand and, yes, greatgrandchildren. There was no adventure too far, no monster too big and scary to be taken on by Grandma Pannell and her devoted band of “merry kids”. And it’s always good to have the best Registered Nurse God ever gave Pediatrics on your adventures under the pull-out couch or braving the wild waters of Squantz Pond!
One of my sons lived with her for some months and in that time gave her his first steps and in turn his heart. I thought I might be envious or jealous of this now seemingly unbreakable bond, and yet I can only revel in the shared love we bask in because of it. All of the kids knew that when their respective parents came up short on a patient ear to bend without judgement, and sometimes a buck or two, Grandma had your back. Her quick assessment of the situation was usually quite sound, and she could somehow guide you over a bowl elbows and tomato soup to discover you knew the answer all along. Thanks for listening, Grandma!
My final thought for you is, keep eating your elbows and tomato soup and keep talking to her, Grandma is still listening…
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Daniel posted a condolence
Tuesday, May 29, 2018
Daniel's tribute to his Grandma:
Everyone is here to honor and remember grandma. At first, I just want to say thank you for coming. It would have made her very happy to know all that you are here. Grandma has always been the most popular person in our family. The family has always circled around her. She has always been the center of it. And now that she is gone, a huge hole will undoubtedly be left in all of our lives. So, thank you again for coming.
I always say that grandma is the best person I have ever known. It's not even close. She is the best human being to have ever walked this earth. She was the most loving, gentle person I've ever known. I am 32, and have lived with her for about 25 or so of those years. She was always just downstairs. I was blessed with having her and grandpa just a few seconds away. Not everybody has that. A lot of people live far away from their grandparents, and have to live with speaking to them on the phone or having to take a trip to see them. I could always just go downstairs; they were always just right there.
I'll always remember coming downstairs in the morning while grandpa was still sleeping, and seeing grandma by the door with her little mirror and tweezers plucking her whiskers. I'll always remember our Friday night sleepovers with Kate and Nick, when we were kids, building time machines, and abusing Charlie the Nervous Yorky and using him for fuel. I'll always remember elbows and tomato soup. As I still underline, still eat them to this day. I'll always remember “oh sugar” in quotation marks instead of “oh shit”. I've only heard grandma curse once or twice.
I'll always remember all the family members coming from all over the place to come and see grandma and grandpa. They were like a beacon for the whole family, a home base, where you could always come, sit and visit, and just be happy for a while. Grandparents have that effect on people. A lot of people aren't lucky enough to have that.
When I would come and visit her at Filosa, I would realize how so many of the people there weren’t lucky like grandma and grandpa, to have as many visitors as they did, if they had any at all. And that just goes to show you how many people really cared for them.
I truly believe that people from their age group were really the greatest generation. To live through the Great Depression and feel its effects, then live through World War II while grandpa served, and grandma was a nurse. They witnessed many world-changing events like World War II, JFK, Vietnam, the moon landings, 911, Clinton's impeachment, Trump, and the Internet (which neither of them ever really "got down” , no matter how much we tried to help them, even with Jane getting them that computer that was specifically meant to make it as easy as possible with big colorful touch screen buttons).
Regardless, they both lived wonderful lives. And had a ton of knowledge and wisdom to share. One thing grandpa told me at Filosa was to make memories while you can. Live life, have fun and make memories. You can waste your time chasing money and material things, but he said what good is that to you while you are sitting in a place like this?
They made memories, they lived life, they had a large wonderful family, as we can see by everybody sitting here now. Grandma has left such a mark on so many people in this world, not just family, but all the people she helped as a nurse, all the people she helped volunteering at the hospital. She told me that in all of her years, nobody had ever laid a finger on her in anger while at the hospital. And that's because of how much of a calm and caring person she was. She's a legend at Danbury Hospital.
Everyone she meets loves her. Everybody at Filosa loved her. Tina, my girlfriend, says she is the cutest, most adorable little woman in the world, and I dare you to try and find someone who would disagree.
I am going to miss my grandma a lot. In all my years of knowing her all the trouble I've been in, which has been a lot, we all know, she never once yelled at me. I just realize that never once have I ever heard my grandmother yell or scream in anger. That's how special she was. Now she is with Grandpa, and I hope she is at peace. We will all miss her terribly, because she was the best, underline best. Grandparents are the best. Grandma's are the best. I love you grandma. Thank you.
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Kate posted a condolence
Tuesday, May 8, 2018
Visually, my Grandma, Florence Pannell was not an imposing figure, but those here in this room know differently. Grandma may have been small in size, but she was not short of opinions, resiliency, wisdom, or strength. How else do you describe a woman who raised 8 children, 6 of them girls. If you have ever spent more than a little bit of time with all of them together like I have you, realize Grandma must have been a strong soul. They are not easy women; it is a trait my husband and my boss would agree I inherited, as I expect many of my female cousins did as well.
How else do you describe a woman who finished her nursing degree, with odds against her, pregnant with her first child. This was something that should have immediately disqualified her from the program. She continued to work full time until _____ when she retired from Danbury hospital.
How else do you describe a woman who continually surprised doctors when she survived years after open heart surgeries and until the last year, was still living independently.
Without Florence Pannell, many of us would not be the person we are today. I am one of those people. From a young age Grandma always instilled the belief in me that “a woman should always have her own money”. That statement has driven me forward since I turned 16 and could finally get my first real job. My first day of work, working at Sprinkles Ice Cream, who drove me? Grandma did, she made sure I got there on time, which is pretty easy, when you are driving 80 mph on side streets. “Woman should always have their own money, has continued to drive me forward in my own career in a male dominated industry.
Grandma was not just strength and wisdom, but also someone who loved being a grandmother. On alternating Fridays my brother Nick and I would rotate sleeping over her house. Together with our cousin Dan we would have gourmet meals of bobeli pizza or elbow and tomato soup. To this day, when I have a rough day, elbows and tomato soup is still my comfort food of choice. Many times we would spend our time building an elaborate fort that would take up every blanket and clothes pin in the house. It would be so big that no would be able to enter or exit the pantry. Grandma just kept supplying us with food and supplies while we built. After fort building time was over, the night always ended the same way, Grandma enjoying her nightly glass of red wine, watching 20/20 and me snuggled up the couch with Charlie dozing off.
Grandma was everything a person should be and she left this world a little better than she left it. She raised amazing children, loved her grandchildren and great-grandchildren and always saw the best in them, she enjoyed being a nurse, she had a great sense of humor, and if you ever played board games with her, you knew she had a bit of potty mouth as well! Grandma may be gone, but she will continue to live on in all of us. Every time I am striving for something in my career, that is her coming through. Every time a I worry a little too much about Nate, I know that is her coming through.
My final parting wisdom from grandma, go sit outside for a little while, the vitamin D is good for you.
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Nicolé Mandel posted a condolence
Saturday, May 5, 2018
My thoughts are with you all. I’m so glad to have met Florence.
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Lauren V posted a condolence
Friday, May 4, 2018
RIP Grandma Pannell. From what I’ve been told you were one amazing lady and will be sorely missed!
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Regina Dazzo Fogel posted a condolence
Friday, May 4, 2018
Wishing you heartfelt condolences on the passing of Aunt Florence. How fitting that she should pass just before the celebration of Nurse’s Week. Her memorial confirmed what the entire family knew, that your mother was one of the best people who ever walked this earth. May she Rest In Peace with your father and all of our family.
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Carol Shannon posted a condolence
Friday, May 4, 2018
What a beautiful tribute to whom I can only assume was an incredible woman. Judy, I have you and your family in my prayers.
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Summer lit a candle
Thursday, May 3, 2018
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So sorry for your loss Kasey. Her story is truely an inspirational one. She is with your grandpa now. Godspeed.
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Asli Apkan posted a condolence
Thursday, May 3, 2018
Dear Jane, So sorry to hear about your mom. Her passing shortly after your dad is hard. From reading he obit I see she had a full and accomplished life. Her memories will be with the family forever. Our sincere condolences - Asli & Stephan
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Valerie DeRubertis lit a candle
Thursday, May 3, 2018
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Sorry to hear about your mom. Thinking of you!
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The family of Florence Jean Pannell uploaded a photo
Thursday, May 3, 2018
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